This is Because I Love You Too Much

Everything I do seems pointless
And nowhere
I see stars because of the
Darks shadows created by clouds
I see nothing but your
Lightened face
Smiling, even not at me

I long to touch your hand
And feel the inexplicable
Sensation of selflessness

I wish you will see who I am
Not for who I am with,
Not for who I seem to show
I want you to see what's under my skin
The nerves of pain that keep me going,
And the stimulants which I keep taking

Then maybe you will see
The sorrow no one else sees,
Nor feels
Because everything seems beyond me

Swamped Hole

Little becomes more
Slowly, gradually, waiting for time
Pouring and showering me
I ran deeper into it
Running for who knows how long
I didn't stop
I can't stop

I slipped
I broke down
There,
Just by the tree
With the pain from my hands
My knees,
Scarring not only my body
Also my soul

I stand up
I'm resilient
But I get tired
All the lone souls running after me do not
All the pain that sears doesn't too
All those sadness they carry with them

I take them under my weak abode
Believing I am strong
But they are pulling me down
Little becomes more
I know
But I do not stop them

Gardening

I end up
Sprawled on a golden meadow,
Grains burnt by the sun,
Cottons flewn by the
Flowing wind

The heart attached under the earth
Rooted with the dirt,
With saltwater as the nourishment
Emotions do not grow on trees
They grow beneath,
Like a root-crop

Hidden.

Show Me

Show me how it feels
To singed with ashes
And fall with burns
Tearing thy skin
Smelling of rotten cigarettes
And dusted flesh

See me live
Walk amongst dead
of beautiful and laughing faces
As if it was their last
On their grave

Touch me with hands
Show me how to feel
Teach me how to live

Maybe... just maybe
I'd feel much number

Salvation

Save me the tears
I don't want them anymore,
Save me the longing,
I don't want to yearn anymore.
Be my guest,
Don't give me pain,
And wrench my heart out,
Like it's something
Made of clay.

Give me dreams,
Not just stinging words,
Leave me with memories
That wouldn't hurt as much anymore.

Smile

I stared at your lips
And wished they were mine,
If they were,
Then I would ask for nothing,
But a vault
To lock them in,
And a marble engraved
With the letters of a
Secret,
And a hidden and isolated
Lot wherein
I could bury my keepsake
And keep it forever.

This is How Much I Love You

You asked me once,
I kept my mouth shut.
You asked me twice,
I said, it didn't matter.

I could have given my whole life
Trying to look for an answer
Because I knew I can't find
The right words,
Nor even the right hymns
To tell you how much
I love you.

So I say,

I love you as long as the stars are up there.

I love you as much as I love the twinkle in a happy eye.

I love you until the ocean remains blue in my eyes.

I love you like I see everything as rainbow.

I love you more than the birds love flight.

I love you like I've never known love before.

I love you like this would be the last time I will love.